TLDR: Engine is out. Pictures throughout...
My father is in town for a few weeks and has been anxious to help me work on my Touareg. He has more of a woodworking background but loves to tinker and work, plus he's one of my best friends as well. So today we really tore into it.
First up was setting up the work area. It's hot and humid in north Florida, so shade helps a lot.
We rolled slowly but steadily through wiring disconnections, hose disconnections, and exhaust disconnections. Then came time to remove the starter in order to access the torque converter bolts. Here it is, half behind the motor mount bracket in the passenger side...
Damnit. So much for leaving the front cradles in place. Down goes the suspension cradle to make room.
Once that was lowered we squeezed the engine cradle with mounts attached out and removed the starter bolts. One is below the starter and very obvious. The other comes from the transmission side and is terrible to access. There aren't any pictures of the during, but here's a shot of where the bolt goes. This is from the top of the trans on the passenger side. That raised portion is for the starter bolt.

{this picture is taken after the engine was removed}
Took about 2' of extension, with the wrench wedged between the trans and tunnel to access the bolt successfully. But, here is the starter out without removing the engine completely, and without removing the exhaust manifold as others have done.
After that rolling the engine out was cake. Remove the TC bolts and engine/trans bolts and pull it straight out.
Side by side with the replacement.
So this weekend I'll probably work to get the replacement in then start replacing consumables (timing belt, water pump/thermostat), rollers, etc...). Then it's just a matter of getting everything back in.
And still a little evidence of my shame in the throttle body pipe.
And if anyone is wondering, here are the breathers for the trans and transfer case. Black tubes with breather ends on them in the middle of the picture.
